croupier

yesterday i went up to Genting Highland for walk-in interview. thr r many positions n i couldnt make up my mind to choose. i hv sum classmates workin as Guest Service Assistant at the casino. i've nvr been in a casino b4 as i hvn reach the age of 21. my fren suggested me to try Croupier. croupier is also known as dealer. as u all noe, croupier's job is to deal cards at the table, sounds easy rite? so i think i'll gv dat a try.

i filled up the application form n waited whole day for my name to be called. n finally, i was the last one went in. god, the interview was kinda hard. they checked my hand to make sure dat i dont hv sweaty palms. then they checked my colour vision. n the last 1 is the hardest which is mental calculation. ahh..i nvr like calculation, hate it so much. bt i managed to solve all the questions aftr crackin my rusty brain. @__@

the interviewer told me dat i was accepted n pass me the letter. he explained dat i wil start trainin on 1st July for 22 days. i wil hv to report to HR on dis comin wednesday. aftr trainin, thr wil be an exam. if i pass, i cn stay thr n bcum normal worker. if fail, den i hv to pack my stuff n leave. oh ya, they provide us wit accomodation n meals.

well, not much time left. better start packin my stuff now. anyway, wish me luck for the croupier exam. wait, did i mention dat croupier's attire r skirt, high heels, pantyhose n maybe sum make-ups? oh god help me~~T__T  

a home that doesn't felt like a home..

i juz came bk to kl from my holidays in kch a few days ago..the "home" which i refer to is the one in kch..as wat i've told u in my previous post, my dad bought a house but we still cant move in yet so we're currently stayin at a temporarily house..

it was a total suck whn the 1st day i landed in kch..cant even go bk to my own home..thr is no place to slp..dat aunty's daughter is slpin at my bed..all i wanted aftr a tiring flight journey is a warm rest..but no..i cant get it at my own home..lucky me dat i hv a circle of good frens at kch, dey offered me a night stay at their place til my dad arrange a place for me to slp..

n so i stayed over at Karen's..but i couldn't slp cz i caught a flu n sneezin nonstop..so i jz lie down at her living room sofa, waitin for time to pass..managed to fell aslp though, bt it din last for more than half an hour..it was so sufferin for me..i drove my dad's car to Karen's, wit all my luggage in it..n my dad told me dat he wana use his car early nex mornin..so he called at 6am, i rushed to him..imagined me speedin 120km/h frm 11th miles to kch at 6am wit my eyes barely open!

it was so messy as i get my 1st sight on dat temporarily house..n so dusty dat it keeps me sneezin nonstop the moment i stepped in..i hate it so much..i think i've gone crazy the nex moment i enter my room..i cant stand it..the heat in dat room..haiz!

but it's ok..i jz nid a place to slp..the rest of the time im out wit my frens..i dun like to stay at home..the fact dat aunty n her daughter is around, reli makes me feel like a stranger at dat house..im feelin so awkward..it doesn't feel like home u noe..even my dad nw pays more attention to his stepdaughter..dis is wat reli breaks my heart the most..hw would u feel if ur own dad loves other children more than his own children??

from deep down my heart, i seriously blamed my dad for not teachin my little siblings well..my youngest sis doesn't listen to me, i caught my 11yrs old bro smokin wit a bunch of bad frens few days b4 i came bk kl, n even my sis who jz got bk from NS are behavin so wild..i duno wat to do wit dem..

the fact dat im so far from dem, i cn oni let dem be..for now, i nid to focus on finding job to support myself..

 

i hate HIM!

dun be surprise if dis "HIM" refers to the person call Daddy..yes, i hate my own dad..in fact, i've been hating him ever since he gt his 1st gf 2yrs aftr my mum passed away..n dat 1st gf of his (which i refer to as motherfuckin cocksucker bitch), took omos everyth away frm us, includin torn my family apart..

n guess wat? thgs r nvr the same anymore..i admit im nt dat close wit my dad since small, bt aftr mum left, i've been closer to him in dat 2yrs..jz as i tot our relationship wil gets better, dat bitch came n changed everyth..n thx to her dat i've made the biggest decision in my life - leave my family n frens, my lovely hometown, to further study in KL..i couldnt stand livin under the same roof wit her..u cant imagine how it's like..

aftr omos 3yrs, dat bitch finally left our home cz my dad force her to leave..gud news i tot it was, until bad thgs start to happened..u'll nvr noe rite..alrite i'll skip dat part..early of dis yr, he found his 2nd gf..well, i cn say dat she's way better than the 1st one..dats the 1st impression she gave me..bt wat if i thk it the other way..?

i reli gv a deep thought on it..even tho dis aunty is gud, bt my dad somehow still neglect us..he spent too much time wit her than wit us, his own children..based on my common sense, i guess dey had already registered themselves as husband n wife..n FYI, dis aunty had a daughter (her husband ran away some time ago)..i jz hope dat in future, i dun hv to wake up the nex mornin receivin news dat i hv new stepbrother or stepsister..

due to spendin too much time wit her, my dad care less bout the younger ones..i reli pity dem..i hate my dad cz he did nt educate dem well..if oni i hv enuf money, im sure gona brin dem over here..(moral: dun hv too many children if u cant afford to support dem!) providin food, shelter n education oni is nt enuf if lack of LOVE! mark my words, love is the most important thg in raising ur children..

nobody dat i cn depend on to look aftr my youngest sis..even my 2nd sis is useless, wat more to say my bro..n my youngest sis's godmother, she is totally useless as well.."godmother" is jz a name..she nvr reli did her responsibilities..fuck off..

my dad bought another house..a double-storey..the previous apartment rent to othr ppl..yes, we're goin to live wit dat aunty n her daughter..dis is wat i've nvr imagined..n big possibilities dat i hv to share room wit her daughter if i go bk kch during my holidays..try to force down a bottle of poison down my throat i oso wont call her "mummy"..grr..

thr r more bad thgs dat he did, bt i think it's pointless for me to continue anymore..i shud end my post here..im nt used to talk so details bout my family prob in my blog..jz wana talk my heart out..

n reli thx for accompanying me..i felt much better..

sleepless night

fuck me! wat am i doin here so early in the morning??? ah..another sleepless night. few weeks back, i found myself havin difficulties when slpin at nite. n those weird dreams r hauntin me again. wtf..i cn oni slp in the mornin n woke up around 7pm in the evening..argh..i nid to get out of the houz n taste sum sunlight..@__@

im MAD!

yeah, i think i must hv been mad..to hv my hair cut until dis short. haha..well, sometimes, some things jz need to be changed. im not dat obsess wit dis hairstyle, jz think dat it's ok..but..hmm..sum1 dun like it..=__=

i noe it's been "dino-age" dat i've put any pics in my post. it's not dat i dun wan to, bt im kinda lazy n i dun hv any nice pic recently. sory! haha..

stayin at home witout doin anyth drives me mad as well. not much to do, on9, watch movie, sleep, eat. n im losing weight. u must think im crazy, bt i am losing weight! wat the.. sum1 is goin to hate me for dis..=__=

wat am i doin now is, countin da days for me to fly bk to my hometown. reli cant wait for dat day to come! yea, it's been dino-age since da laz time i went bk too..

Gay Club??

dis morning went swimming at college wit MunYee. after swimming, i accompany her to admin office to do her stuff. den we saw Kevin sitting alone at canteen so we approached him to say hi. bt he oni noe how to ask, "Susan leh???" the same ques..=__=

as we were walkin to the sch gate, WernHwee called MunYee n ask us to join her at canteen. so instead of havin our lunch at TBR, we jz hv it at canteen. (suan la, gt sum1 so cheap 1) LOL!

im surprised to see Nicole was thr too. n so we chit chat thr. we talked about our upcoming gathering. date n venue is nt confirm yet. den suddenly MunYee said dat we shud try to go gay club like wat Sandra suggested in our event's wall in fb.

i think dats a gud idea. whole class go clubbing. haha..bt i think we shud jz go to the normal club instead of the gay's..=__= anyways, cant wait for the gathering guys!!=D

long break

i guess dis is my 1st post for April. it's been awhile since i update my blog. it's kinda dead i noe. well, here am i again.

finally my training ends. n so does my exam. oh ya, i didnt mention dat i failed 4 subj previous sem. total is 5 subj dat i hv to resit. bt dis sem i oni resit 2 subj, da rest i'll wait for another year. so i hv a long whole year of rest. dats mean i wont be graduatin in time, which is suppose to be dis year.

my trainin appraisal is kinda gud, bt nt my report. so disappointed wit it. dun ask me bout it. n so does my F&B Mgmt exam. haiz..

anyway, i think im gona bk hometown around end of May. aftr half a year din go bk, i noe thr's alot of changes..especially.....

thx to 'sum1' who r owas thr 4 me all da time..^3^